Oktoberfest – Munich 18-21st September 2015

Prior to Oktoberfest I had been in Munich for almost a week. You could feel the anticipation in the air, whether it was the preparation for the festival itself, the countless beer festivals that had closed off main streets throughout the city during the lead-up, the influx of apparent tourists or the look on the face of local Germans when you would approach them and start with “sorry, I only speak English”. Their look said it all; it’s that time of year again.

The actual festival really started for me on the Friday afternoon when I checked in to the campsite I was staying at (which I could write pages on in itself), when we were handed beers in the line to check-in. Anyway, after a night of debauchery at the campsite we were up before the sun in our lederhosen and dirndl’s ready to get amongst it (feeling slightly worse for wear).

So as it turns out, opening weekend at Oktoberfest in Munich is pretty popular. Who would have known? Considering 6 million people come out of the woodworks for Oktoberfest each year to participate it was a necessary evil to get there early. So there we were, 7am and lining up with thousands of other thirsty enthusiasts all ready to get into the tents and mark their territory (some more literally than others due to the 45 minute line for the toilet). At 9am the doors opened and that’s when the extent of the crowd’s excitement and thirst started to show. Instantly, it was as if every single person in the line of thousands thought they had an open line straight to the door. Everyone in the first few hundred people are instantly forced to get to know each other REALLY quickly, rammed together by that amount of people there’s not much room for courtesies. While every person there is simultaneously trying to get in and not have a panic attack due to lack of oxygen and inability to move, I remember looking down at the 5 foot tall girl next to me and feeling very sorry for her, at least I was tall enough to look up and get a breath of fresh air. Anyway, after a bit of a struggle everyone got through and breathed a (deep) sigh of relief.

Now this is where the fun starts, people are still flooding in and everyone’s spreading throughout the hall. This is about 9:30 in the morning and on the opening day they don’t even tap the keg and serve beer until midday! I don’t know what they expect everyone to do during this time but everyone seems to entertain themselves one way or another. So after possibly the longest two and half hours of my life the mayor of Munich shows his face on stage and gives a short spiel, first in German to which he gets a moderate response from the minority of people there that actually speak the language, and then in English (in a thick German accent) to which he gets a roar from thousands of Aussies, Kiwi’s and Brit’s that make up the majority of this “traditional German festival”.

After this the keg is tapped and the people on stage start filling steins. These first beers from the keg are free and are handed down to anyone in front of the stage, so of course everyone is clambering over each other and sitting on each other’s shoulders in an attempt to get one of the first beers of Oktoberfest 2015 from the hands of the mayor himself. Everyone else waits semi-patiently for a German waitress to put down the seventeen steins she’s already carrying so that they can order a beer for themselves. Once the beers are flowing all is well, everyone seems to calm down a bit (briefly) but nonetheless its smiles all round for the thousands now jammed inside the beer tent.

So now it’s about 3pm and the scene inside the tent is slightly different. Its… how do I put this delicately? It’s… fucking mayhem. Steins are smashing, pork knuckle is flying and people are trying their very best to sing in German all the while there are unmistakeable screams of “PROST!” resounding throughout the tent. If you’ve never been to Oktoberfest before you might be unfamiliar with the tradition of people standing on their table and attempting to down their whole stein. Sounds easy right? Wrong. This goes one of two ways; either the punter pulls it off and gets a pretty memorable experience of thousands of people cheering for them, or they get an equally memorable experience of having to pour whatever is left in their stein over their head while the same amount of people boo them and throw pretzels, pork or whatever is within arm’s reach at them. Either way; hilarious.

So day one is finished and from what my bank account tells me a few days later, I needed assistance getting back to the campsite in the form of a taxi. The driver of which I’m sure was ecstatic to drive my paralytic, lederhosen-wearing ass home. Probably while I slurred to him about how much I love Germany… and Oktoberfest… and beer.

Day two was much the same as day one, minus having to get up at that ungodly hour. That being said, my deflating mattress made sure I was up nice and early so I didn’t miss anything. So thoughtful! People start emerging from their tents; majority of which, myself included, are still wearing their clothes from the day before. Convenient! Everyone at the campsite heads for the breakfast line which just so happens to be right next to the bar. Again, convenient! So after some food and a hair of the dog (or seven) we stumble to the bus to head back in to do it all over again.

Same shit, different tent. Day two was much more of a blur, but equally as fun as the first. We were lucky enough to bump into some long-lost friends from our time in Ios and caught up over a few beers and had a good laugh at each other’s outfits. After too many litres of beer and some amazing German food it was time for me to head home, although this time I took my chances on the public transport. The only thing was, every time I would try and approach someone to maybe ask for directions, they crossed the street or just flat out ignored me. It’s almost as if they didn’t speak English and/or didn’t want to talk to a drunk Australian in Lederhosen on a Sunday night. Weird!

When it came time to leave the next day I was one short beer away from (intentionally) missing my bus to Switzerland and staying an extra day (or week) but alas, all good things must come to an end and I could hear the faint sound of my liver screaming “NO, PLEASE LEAVE”. All in all it was one of my favourite experiences of my trip so far. I’ve really never been somewhere with the same atmosphere. Such a ridiculous amount of people crammed together in a space, and it would seem they are the happiest collection of people on earth at that time. It was incredible. An amazing weekend with amazing people and one that I’m sure I won’t forget for many many years to come. A big thanks to everyone that contributed to such an unforgettable experience for me, you know who you are. See you next year.